Enjoying my current season.

Hi guys,

To anyone who is reading, I want to invite yall into my personal life starting today. I'm actually going through something most people usually refer to as being single however to me it just feels like being alone. I don't know if some of you may feel the same? If so, I invite you to join me on this journey that I will embark starting today, September 26, 2015. So let me give yall a little insight on what is going on:

I'm 20 years old, single and know a guy at work who I assume really likes me. I can see how he pursues me even after I told him twice I really didn't want to be in a relationship. PLOT TWIST. I do want to be in a relationship and he is someone that I've actually started to have feelings for, so what do I do know? Do I just tell him to forget what I said and let him take me out on a date? So that in possibly a few weeks we'd be a couple, then a married couple, then parents? 

The answer my friends is no. 

God has my future husband for me, I know it. He has my future husband, my future career, my future kids; But sometimes I get really impatient. If you know me, you know that I do not like waiting. You will most likely 9 times out of 10 see me clicking the "end process" button 50 times before it actually ends the process. When I feel like God is taking longer than I want him to, I take matters into my own hands and time after time have ended up back in his arms crying my eyes out wanting to turn back time. "If only I had kept my eyes focused on your promise, on your goodness, I wouldn't be in this situation. If only I had waited on you." So do I really have feelings for this guy? Or is it just that he is the only guy that has pursued me in my whole lifetime?

I am so obsessed with the fact of being in a relationship with someone, someone who loves me, someone I can love. Someone who I can talk to every day and can call my own. Someone who will let me feel safe and give me butterflies every day. This guy at work seems to fit the part. He has the capability of filling the emptiness in my heart that I am looking for. But there is another. 
There is another person who has tried out for the part a million times before, but I always seem to misplace the head-shot. The same person who will do all that I am asking for plus infinity. The same person who has the capability of filling that empty feeling in my heart 110% vs. the 20% that my work buddy would. Only one name: Jesus. 

I logged into my blog today and read a post that I wrote back in January of this year. In a nut shell i wrote about enjoying my singleness and embracing my relationship with God all in the meantime. Sadly my friends, that has not been the case. I have been so caught up in finding my future guy. "Maybe I will find him here, maybe I will find him there." But we all no things aren't found that way. Have you ever lost something and after 30 minutes of frantic search, still nothing? Then when you're not looking, whoop there it is? I am so convinced that that's God's same tactic with blessings. It's only when we rest in the Lord's presence, enjoying the season that we are in, that he turns around catching us off guard, granting our hearts desires. 

"God I wasn't even expecting this now!" I said. "Yeah, that was kind of the point", says God.

God loves to see us happy. He wants to give us what we need and want, but of course there is one condition. No he doesn't want money, he doesn't want a free car wash every two weeks for the whole year. He only requires us to follow him. Drop what we have and follow him. Drop our cares and our worries in his hands and follow him. Trust not only in his process but in his promise and follow him. 

I want to enjoy my season of singleness and the only way I can do that is putting my whole focus on God and following him to where he takes me. He will lead me to my future guy someday but for right now I will enjoy being only next to him. If you are stuck in a season that you are anxious to get out of, I encourage to lay it down on the ground and walk with God while spring comes around. Join me as I do the same. 

"The one."

 

 

If you're single I wanna see them hands raised!

I've been having my hand raised for quite sometime now. My only "relationships" were during high school. I had three boyfriends and all of them only lasted about a week and maybe even less.

It was definitely them and not me of course.

But today I'm gonna be completely honest with all of you guys (the only people that probably read this is my sisters lol) I want a boyfriend already. You don't need a man but it would be nice to have one am I right ladies? And sometimes when you really want something but are just too impatient to wait for it, you get something that doesn't even measure up to what you deserve.

I have a small disease that my love doctor has diagnosed as an "Attention seeker." Symptoms are having feelings for the first guy that gives you more attention than you're used to. Don't worry it's not contagious and I've taken some medicine for it.

If you have this, i'll recommend the medicine of prayer. You can take it any time of the day and it doesn't even have to be a huge dose, but I can tell you this; it works.
Now that i'm in college, things aren't the same. I'm not looking for a boyfriend that lasts a couple of months. I'm looking for someone who likes long walks on the beach, and loves dogs...okay i sound like dating website.
I'm looking for a future husband now.
And because of this, I cannot settle for something less than the best.

This guy drinks and doesn't have the same beliefs as me but atleast he thinks i'm cute  and tells me all these cute little things so i'll settle for him.

NO WAY JOSE. (His name was really Jose....jk but wouldn't that be funny?)

My parents always tell me to pray for my future husband. To tell God the type of guy I want but i've always thought it was such a silly idea. My thought was, why does God care about my love life? But he actually does. He cares about even the teeniest problem your facing.

God knows what time is best. And although his timing may seem an eternity for us, his timing is always just right. He knows when he will send me "the one". The one who will love me but will love God more than life itself. Who knows, maybe it's tomorrow or next month; maybe even in a year. But until that day, i'm going to enjoy my life. I'm going to put all of my focus on God. I'm going to run as fast as I can to him and if someone keeps up, i'll introduce myself.

Hopefully he's tall and has green eyes. I mean well it's the inside that counts....but

also his eyes...and his height...

Long distance relationships never work.

Have you ever had that feeling of emptiness?

That feeling as if someone brutally ripped your beating heart right out of your chest?

Well as of right now, I am feeling that exact pain times infinity and beyond!!

Why you ask?

 

Laugh all you want, call me weird all you want but....
MY EYEBROW LADY IS NO LONGER IN THE U.S!!
 

Oh my gosh you have no idea how sad I am!

 

Haha, okay I'm joking; it's not the end of the world of course. Especially because I had my sister call the eyebrow shop she worked at and found out she will be back in May. HOORAY!

 

Now before you start judging me let me give you a little more information on

A) Myself

2) My eyebrows

 

Ever since I came out of my mother's womb I've been a complete perfectionist. Yes nobody is perfect but a girl can try can't she? If one side of my eye make-up didn't look the exact same as the other side, I would sit there for hours and hours re-doing it until I thought it looked perfect.

And if my eyebrows do not look the same on both sides then that's when I draw the line!

 

Now for my eyebrow background...

 

I was cursed with very light potato like eyebrows thanks to my father. Now it's never something I really complained about; when I was young I really couldn't care less about how my eyebrows looked. (To prove it I'll show you some pictures. They were so thin, the side of a piece of paper was thicker than my eyebrows.) But that all changed.

 

When I turned 17 I was introduced to the marvelous art of eyebrow threading. I had let my eyebrows grow out. I went in the eyebrow threading shop with hairy unmanageable eyebrows and left with two glorious trimmed, clean, gorgeously and reasonable thick eyebrows. Ever since that day I was hooked.

 

Now at the time I was living in Houston with my older sister and the times I would get them done, the ladies that attended me would vary; and so would my satisfaction. Some days my eyebrows looked great but others they were just "ehh".

 

I then moved back in with my parents in Austin and needed a new place. "Browz N Henna" at Lakeline Mall was the first and last place I looked. I was seated and in less than 10 minutes I was out with AMAZING eyebrows and all thanks to a lady named Rovita! I've been going to her and only her for a whole year. If she wasn't working that day, I wasn't going to get my eyebrows done either.

 

And so yesterday before going to get them done by my girl Rov. I called to make sure she was working.

 

"She no longer works here".

My whole world... my whole world came crumbling down with just those 5 words spoken to me.

 

Crown me already for being such a dramatic girl but in all honesty I was very disappointed because even though I didn't really know her, she was my bff for making my brows look awesome every time. And now when I go to someone else to get them done, I will feel horrible for cheating on Rovita!

I've already gone through denial, and now I'm going through the "all I want is ice cream and to lie in my bed all day" stage.

 

Moral of the story:  I'm a loon but it's okay.

 

#rovitawhydidyouleave